You know each time i upload a post, i wished i could post something happy but the mind seems to have overflowing emotions. Each day, the heart seems to feel heavier and I've no clue of what had becoming of me now. I could no longer know what i want. Sometime, i wished to get away from myself. I am so tired of being me. There is so much things i wished to tell someone but in the end, the words doesn't come out. All i could now is to numb myself and pretending that everything is fine and pretending that everything is alright. I feel afraid to know sometime new or get closer to something caused i feel that the world is so scary. I hope i can isolate myself and live life simple. You can be truly happy for a period of time and another moment, something can simply hit you so hard. Life could be like an illusion. You wake up and everything you once hold so close is gone. I leave everything to fate. Even at the end, it was all me alone, i promise to be happy..